Monday, July 16, 2012

Dead Beat Parents - Why are they protected by the system???

Disappointed doesn't even begin to describe how I feel today.  After 4 weeks of imagining, dreading, worrying, and thinking about this day, it turns out that it was all for nothing.  Today was supposed to be the day where the court system entered a child support order on behalf of my children, so that they would begin receiving support from their father.  Instead, at about 9:30am, while in my car on the way to the hearing, my attorney calls to inform me that "Ex's" attorney filed for a continuation, citing that he had just been appointed to the case and had not had enough time to prepare.

So I'm sure you are all wondering when this "Request for Continuation" was submitted.
As it turns out, it was submitted this past Friday at 3pm!  So late in the afternoon, in fact, that my attorney and I were never notified.  Instead the only one's who were notified, were my innocent kids.  As I was getting ready for the start of my work week yesterday, my children informed me that their father had shown them paper work showing that our hearing was being postponed.  Not once since this hearing was set 4 weeks ago, did I ever mention to our children, the day that we were going to court. Why, because they are kids and they get no benefit from worrying about when or where their parent's, who cannot get along, are going to end up in court.  They are children, and for this reason, I don't want them worrying, or even thinking about any of this.  I don't want them feeling like they have to take sides, or feeling as though this is their burden to carry.  It angers me to know that my children have to hear about all of this from the one person in the world, who has no idea what is best for them.

I am even more angry at the court system, for allowing and granting a continuation to someone, who had known about this hearing for 4 week, and chose to retain representation 2 days prior to the hearing.  How is that my fault, or my children's fault.  Why is it that this man, who by the way has filed for joint split custody so he can escape his child support obligations, and in the mean time is paying nothing towards their care, allowed to have more time to prepare!!!  Was 4 weeks not enough?  For gods sake, I'm the mother of 5 kids, I work a full time job, and also own my own business which I do after putting in 8 to 10 hours at my full time job...and still, I had time to obtain legal representation.  I had time to put in my paper work, do my research, and still take care of all 5 of my kids.  How can a court system allow that???  Is it really that easy to be a dead beat parent...can it be that the legal system has more protections in place for the dead beat parents than it does for the children they are supposed to be looking out for???

In any event, I guess it doesn't matter what I think, or that he's not spending a single dime to support my kids.  The continuation was granted and our hearing has been pushed out another 4 weeks, to August 16th.  It doesn' matter that I had to pay my attorney to prepare for my hearing on Friday, or that she and I had to call each other 4 times this morning, as we sorted through all this, and it doesn't matter that she and I drove down to the court house for a hearing that was postponed.  All of this which comes out of the retainer that I paid my attorney, who charges me $250 an hour to work on my case.  All money that is now wasted on a hearing that never even happened.  All so that a man who refuses to pay support to his children can have more time to prepare for a child support hearing!

Who is protecting my rights, or the rights of my kids!  I am a parent and by no means do I expect a medal for doing what I am supposed to do, but here I am, the only person ensuring my kids have food on the table, that they have clean clothes on their backs and I'm faced with this tremendous financial hardship because of a man, a father, who is not stepping up and taking care of his responsibility.  Why is it okay for him to not provide for his kids, and worst make things more financially difficult for the person who is carrying the financial burden in the first place.  The system I'm afraid is extremely flawed.

I'm trying to stay positive throughout this process, but I'm afraid that I'm quickly losing faith in the justice system.

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